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Author Topic: The Great Big Thread of Jokes  (Read 357566 times)

coelacanth

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Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
« Reply #1475 on: May 24, 2021, 12:59:28 am »
 :cool
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    Grognard

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #1476 on: May 25, 2021, 10:39:01 am »
    now this was a bit before my time as a LEO, but I was told the story by a Detective Sgt. who was there and swears it to be true. 
    Now this is in Michigan, 1980, and the local PD brings in a guy who they are extremely sure has been burglarizing houses.They busted him with all the tools of the trade & his habits and fence reports all fit a long string of burglaries. 
    But this guy has been very smart and very carefully worn gloves all the time.So the evidence against him is very thin; a confession is needed. 
    A lie detector test is recommended, and a technician shows up.  Unfortunately, somebody dropped the equipment case and the detector is non-functional. 
    But the Chief of Detectives has a great idea.  The dept. just purchased a top of the line, brand new Xerox copier: all the futuristic bells and whistles.  A few Police stickers hides the Xerox logos. 
    The detectives and the Technician make a big deal of wheeling it in and connecting all the Dectector's instrumentation cables to it. 
    The suspect starts to sweat as they connected the instruments to him.The interrogation begins with the Technician asking questions and a Detective quietly assisting at the Xerox 'detector'. 
    simple questions known true, produced a single sheet saying "TRUTH"  - simple questions known to be false, produced a graph laden page saying "He LIES". 
    Apparently, it only took 15 minutes for the crook to cave & confess to a hugely LONG string of burglaries.

    TLDR: Xerox machines can read minds.
    Virginia“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” -Aristotle

    booksmart

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #1477 on: May 25, 2021, 11:22:13 am »
     :rotfl

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