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Author Topic: The Great Big Thread of Jokes  (Read 351483 times)

Bud

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Re: Lindsey Vonn Olympian Presidential Investigation.
« Reply #400 on: August 30, 2010, 07:30:44 pm »
Good one, And you know he may have had a case, except for the fact that is what SHE was supposed to do that :clap :clap :clap :rotfl :rotfl

I am stealing your avatar and then plagerizing it,Claymore.
MissouriBud
Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death! Patrick Henry

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    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #401 on: August 31, 2010, 01:24:10 am »
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    Thernlund

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #402 on: August 31, 2010, 01:57:54 am »
    WTF?!


    -T.
    Arizona  Arm yourself because no one else here will save you.  The odds will betray you, and I will replace you...

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #403 on: August 31, 2010, 01:59:28 am »
    IDK why, but that one cracks me up every time.  Perhaps it's because it's so over-the-top.
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #404 on: August 31, 2010, 02:07:02 am »












    This one is too funny.


    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    ZeroTA

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #405 on: August 31, 2010, 06:37:49 pm »
    Contains grown-up words.

    Spoiler (click to show/hide)

    I'm not saying you should use an M1A for home defense, but I'm also not saying you shouldn't.

    Raptor

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #406 on: September 01, 2010, 12:11:37 am »
    PennsylvaniaNon Timebo Mala -- I Will Fear No Evil

    “Libprogs want conservatives to be silent. Conservatives want libprogs to keep talking so the world can see just how full of sh*t they are.” – Larry Correia

    "When the odds are impossible, count on crazy." - JesseL

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #407 on: September 01, 2010, 04:56:26 pm »
    Toilet Humor (not lewd)

    Spoiler (click to show/hide)
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    Raptor

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #408 on: September 02, 2010, 03:50:48 pm »
    PennsylvaniaNon Timebo Mala -- I Will Fear No Evil

    “Libprogs want conservatives to be silent. Conservatives want libprogs to keep talking so the world can see just how full of sh*t they are.” – Larry Correia

    "When the odds are impossible, count on crazy." - JesseL

    bmitchell

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #409 on: September 02, 2010, 04:32:35 pm »
    I can't believe I watched that to the end...

    Ben

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #410 on: September 04, 2010, 06:13:15 pm »




    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #411 on: September 10, 2010, 12:48:20 am »
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    coelacanth

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #412 on: September 10, 2010, 04:02:10 am »
    Or not  .  .  . :rotfl
    Arizona" A republic, if you can keep it."

                                                   Benjamin Franklin

    Raptor

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #413 on: September 10, 2010, 11:28:34 pm »
    PennsylvaniaNon Timebo Mala -- I Will Fear No Evil

    “Libprogs want conservatives to be silent. Conservatives want libprogs to keep talking so the world can see just how full of sh*t they are.” – Larry Correia

    "When the odds are impossible, count on crazy." - JesseL

    tactical22

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #414 on: September 11, 2010, 03:06:07 am »
    --------------------------
    The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

    --------------------------

    The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight:
    'Searching for Jesus.'

    --------------------------

    Ladies, don't forget the rummage  sale. It's a chance to get rid of those
    things not worth  keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

    --------------------------

    Remember in prayer the many who are  sick of our community. Smile at
    someone who is hard to love.  Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much
    about you.

    --------------------------

    Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

    --------------------------

    Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious
    pleasure to the congregation...

    --------------------------

    For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery
    downstairs.

    --------------------------

    Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir.
    They need all the help they can get.

    --------------------------

    Irving Benson and Jessie  Carter were married on October 24 in the church.
    So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

    --------------------------

    A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
    Music will follow.

    --------------------------

    At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?'
    Come early and listen to our choir practice

    --------------------------

    Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several
    new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

    --------------------------

    Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
    recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

    --------------------------

    Please place your donation in the  envelope along with the deceased person
    you want remembered.
    --------------------------

    The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and
    gracious hostility.

    --------------------------

    Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.

    --------------------------

    The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind.
    They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

    --------------------------

    This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from
    the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

    --------------------------

    Ladies Bible Study will be  held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are
    invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.

    --------------------------

    The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would
    lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

    --------------------------

    Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM.
    Please use the back door.

    -------------------------

    The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church
    basement Friday at 7 PM.
    The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

    --------------------------

    Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.
    Please use large double door  at the side entrance.

    --------------------------

    The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan
    Last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours"
    « Last Edit: September 11, 2010, 04:38:29 am by tactical22 »
    _________
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    ()_)""''"()_)'"''")_)    
    "Solus Christus, Semper Reformanda, Semper Fidelis!"

    "No King But Jesus!"

    "...That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of th

    Thernlund

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #415 on: September 11, 2010, 04:15:53 am »
    Arizona  Arm yourself because no one else here will save you.  The odds will betray you, and I will replace you...

    tactical22

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #416 on: September 11, 2010, 04:38:58 am »
     :rotfl

    very impressive, T. :clap
    _________
    [_I_[_____]             
    [_I_[__[OlllllO]    
    ()_)""''"()_)'"''")_)    
    "Solus Christus, Semper Reformanda, Semper Fidelis!"

    "No King But Jesus!"

    "...That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of th

    sohmdaddy

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #417 on: September 15, 2010, 01:29:03 am »
    His battle cry is "Spooooon!"



    Well, I guess "Spoooork!"

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #418 on: September 17, 2010, 01:33:06 am »
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    tactical22

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #419 on: September 17, 2010, 03:07:59 pm »
     :facepalm
    _________
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    [_I_[__[OlllllO]    
    ()_)""''"()_)'"''")_)    
    "Solus Christus, Semper Reformanda, Semper Fidelis!"

    "No King But Jesus!"

    "...That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of th

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #420 on: September 17, 2010, 04:21:28 pm »
    Teh Internets:


    It's Serious Business

    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    FMJ

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #421 on: September 19, 2010, 12:33:30 pm »
    Information about Gonorrhea Lectim



    The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new
    virulent strain of this old disease. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim.
    It's pronounced "Gonna re-elect 'em," and it is a terrible obamanation.

    The disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior involving
    putting your cranium up your rectum. Many victims contracted it in
    2008...but now most people, after having been infected for the past 1-2
    years, are starting to realize how destructive this sickness is.

    It's sad because Gonorrhea Lectim is easily cured with a new drug just
    coming on the market called Votemout. You take the first dose in 2010 and
    the second dose in 2012 and simply don't engage in such behavior again;
    otherwise, it could become permanent and eventually wipe out all life as we
    know it.

    Please pass this important message on to all those bright folk you really
    care about.
    CaliforniaThere are many like it, but this one is mine.

    tactical22

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #422 on: September 19, 2010, 01:57:47 pm »
     :clap
    _________
    [_I_[_____]             
    [_I_[__[OlllllO]    
    ()_)""''"()_)'"''")_)    
    "Solus Christus, Semper Reformanda, Semper Fidelis!"

    "No King But Jesus!"

    "...That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of th

    archerandshooter

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #423 on: September 19, 2010, 05:02:15 pm »
    FMJ - I love it - is there an attribution?  I'd love to forward that around.
    TWN KALON AGWNA HGWNISMAI

    ZeroTA

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    Re: The Great Big Thread of Jokes
    « Reply #424 on: September 19, 2010, 11:00:44 pm »
    I'm not saying you should use an M1A for home defense, but I'm also not saying you shouldn't.

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