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Author Topic: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!  (Read 9040 times)

Raptor

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Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
« on: July 15, 2012, 10:40:25 pm »
Had a conversation with a neighbor today that hit a level of stupid so extreme, I had to share it with y'all.

Background/context: There's a series of what looks to be pretty nasty thunderstorms making their way towards our area. Forcast is calling for severe T-Storms and an excessive heat warning through Wednesday, which means folks will be running their air conditioners full-blast. So, between the storms and the heat, odds are pretty good that the local power grid is gonna go down at some point. And because my neighborhood is on a small circuit, we tend to be the among last ones who get power back. During last year's big snow storm, AKA SNOWMAGEDDON III, the area was without power for three days. Fortunately, after that fiasco, several families in the neighborhood, including the Raptor Clan and the neighbor who "inspired" this thread. 72 hours with no heat, showers that ranged in temperature from “Ice-cold” to “Freeze-your-nuts-off” and eating cold canned goods will do that.

Anyway, I got into a conversation with this neighbor, and our conversation turned towards the impending bad weather. Now, Neighbor was very concerned (okay, she was freaking out) that they'd be without power for days with no A/C, which I thought was odd considering they have a generator that can at least power some fans. This was the ensuing conversation:

Quote
Raptor: Your generator works, right?

Neighbor: I don't know.

Raptor: “Have you guys tested it yet?”

Neighbor: “I don’t know.”

Raptor: Is there any gas in it?”

Neighbor: “I have no idea. Look, the generator is [Husband]‘s thing. I don’t bother with it. I don’t know about it, and I don’t wanna know about it.”

Raptor: “But… it’s your house too…”

Neighbor: “I don’t believe in generators.”

Raptor: *brain breaks* “… … you… you don’t… WHA…?”

Neighbor: “I didn’t even want one in the first place. They make fumes, which get in the house and kill people, and they’re loud, which will drive my dog crazy and bother the neighbors.”

The conversation went downhill from there: I quickly learned that this woman is terrified of pretty much everything involving any sort of technology that's more advanced than flint and steel. And no, I am not exaggerating one bit.

Of course, this is the same woman that doesn't mind being sexually assaulted/mosted and/or put through the cancer-causing X-ray machines by the TSA because, and I quote: "“If it’ll keep the terrorists from blowing us up, it’s worth it.”


TEH STOOPID! IT BURNS US!

« Last Edit: July 15, 2012, 10:55:34 pm by Raptor »
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    coelacanth

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #1 on: July 15, 2012, 10:47:03 pm »
    Just roll with it .  .   .    .
    Arizona" A republic, if you can keep it."

                                                   Benjamin Franklin

    JesseL

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #2 on: July 15, 2012, 11:01:50 pm »
    Where would all our SHTF scenarios be without people like that? They're the ones that make great meat shields and whose stuff we'll pick out of the rubble.
    Arizona

    coelacanth

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #3 on: July 15, 2012, 11:04:19 pm »
    True.  Uprising would have been a thirty second story on the evening news if everybody had their collective sh*t together. 
    Arizona" A republic, if you can keep it."

                                                   Benjamin Franklin

    Gunnguy

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #4 on: July 15, 2012, 11:46:53 pm »
    Yawning News Anchor: "Yyaaaawwwnnn!!!!

    In other news today a rampant spread of the Zed virus aboard a commercial flight from China was stopped. It was put to rest when common people, using their God given brains to figure it out, shot and hacked to pieces the dozen or so infected living-dead. No one else was harmed. Film at eleven."



    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

    Raptor

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #5 on: July 15, 2012, 11:51:51 pm »
    I should probably add that this woman is not typical of the neighborhood. We're not a community full of preppers, but most folks are smart enough to at least own a generator and keep it fueled, as well as keep some extra food on-hand and make sure their grills have propane in the tanks.

    That said, I also had a conversation with Mama Raptor tonight: seems a few of our generator-less neighbors have declared that should the neighborhood loose power, they will be coming over to our house to ride things out. Not asked us nicely and we told them it will be okay, but decided that this is how it's gonna be. Now most of these folks are, in my experience, relatively good people, though a few are somewhat less-so. Our immediate next-door-neighbor in particular has Mama Raptor particularly concerned. As a joke, I asked if I'd be allowed to buy a shotgun if this guy came over. Mama Raptor told me she'd give me the money for it. And she wasn't joking.

    As far as I know, the guy isn't particularly dangerous, though we're fairly certain he's a high-functioning alcoholic (20+ years we've lived next door to him, not once have we seen him without an open container of cheap booze in hand). Since my maternal grandfather was an alcoholic who used to beat the s*** out of his wife and kids, I wager this is the source of Mama Raptor's anxiety. That said, given our past experience with this guy, if he ever does decide to take up residence here (and I chose that phrase deliberately) at the very least, probably nothing short of the police showing up will get him to leave.
    « Last Edit: July 16, 2012, 12:02:27 am by Raptor »
    PennsylvaniaNon Timebo Mala -- I Will Fear No Evil

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    "When the odds are impossible, count on crazy." - JesseL

    Gunnguy

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #6 on: July 16, 2012, 12:06:54 am »
    Yeah...uh huh.
    Neighbors don't seem to understand boundaries when it comes to family and home and property.
    It's one thing to invite people over if power is out and plans were made ahead of time.
    But show up on my doorstep and basically try to guilt me into letting you in and you will be turned down.
    Press the issue and you will have a firearm shown to you.
    We may be neighbors, and we may be on friendly terms at the moment, but we can refuse these terms at any moment you decide not to be friendly.

    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

    onesmack4u

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #7 on: July 16, 2012, 12:08:17 am »
    You may want to go ahead and get that shotgun. An axe handle is always handy for a less lethal alternative as well. Once he shows up it will probably be too late for a shopping trip.
    AlabamaI have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #8 on: July 16, 2012, 12:10:51 am »
    You may want to go ahead and get that shotgun. An axe handle is always handy for a less lethal alternative as well. Once he shows up it will probably be too late for a shopping trip.
    Preach it, Bama-man!


    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

    Sarge

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #9 on: July 16, 2012, 12:11:32 am »
    When people try that I tell them "If you ain't kin, you ain't coming." If they push or try to blow me off I tell them I got six feet in the backyard they can have anytime.
    New York"If you’re not shootin’, you should be loadin’. If you’re not loadin’, you should be movin’. If you’re not movin’, someone’s gonna cut your head off and put it on a stick."--Clint Smith

    Kaso

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #10 on: July 16, 2012, 12:35:58 am »
    That said, given our past experience with this guy, if he ever does decide to take up residence here (and I chose that phrase deliberately) at the very least, probably nothing short of the police showing up will get him to leave.
    The police are going to be working doubletime, in an event such as that.  They might take a while to respond to a non-dangerous squater situation.

    I can be there in five hours.  :coffee



    Kaso

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #11 on: July 16, 2012, 12:44:20 am »
    Quote
    but decided that this is how it's gonna be

    Many, many, many people think this way. Many have no concept of "private property", "no trespassing", etc. I catch a goodly number of people (usually suburb and city folk) who think they have all the right in the world to come onto my property during normal times. Horseriders are particularly bad about it, they'll cut fences and such without a second thought.

    Had one guy pull up in his pickup with a trailer loaded with ATVs and dirtbikes and proceed to unload them and him and his brats tore around on them on my property. Told him to get the hell off and he spouted off that he had a "right" to be there. On my motherfluffing property.

    South Carolina
    I don't THINK I'll ever have to face down routers in the streets.

    I should hope not. Mobs of rogue woodworking tools would suck to repel.

    Raptor

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #12 on: July 16, 2012, 12:48:32 am »
    You may want to go ahead and get that shotgun. An axe handle is always handy for a less lethal alternative as well. Once he shows up it will probably be too late for a shopping trip.

    I think I've got better than an ax-handle: a boken and a pair of escrima sticks. And while I'm not terribly good with them, I can still wield them well enough to raise a few welts should the situation require it. And my 3 D-cell Maglite is big enough and heavy enough to make an effective club too.

    The police are going to be working doubletime, in an event such as that.  They might take a while to respond to a non-dangerous squater situation.

    I can be there in five hours.  :coffee



    Kaso

    Thanks, Kaso, but I think we'll be okay. He's not belligerent or anything, he just doesn't take the hint: a 'quick hello' for this guy is an hour droning on about every single thing that's happened to him since we last spoke. Worst comes to worst, I've got friends with guns who are about a half-hour away. And honestly, this guy will probably leave once he figures out we don't keep beer in the house.

    Mostly I bring this stuff up because I'm excited that a) my parents are slowly recognizing that yes a SHTF situation can and will happen and they actually need to prepare for it, and b) there's a chance the no-firearms-if-you-want-to-live-here rule might go away. And the gun situation is probably gonna be moot in a few months anyway: I've put in for a higher-paying position at work and am starting to look for an apartment with the aforementioned gun-toting friends. Hopefully by fall I'll be outta here.
    PennsylvaniaNon Timebo Mala -- I Will Fear No Evil

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #13 on: July 16, 2012, 12:53:44 am »
    Told him to get the hell off and he spouted off that he had a "right" to be there.
    Proper response: Pump the action of a shotgun, and tell him: "Pedestrians have the right of way, but that doesn't mean they should step in front of something that can hurt them.



    Kaso

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #14 on: July 16, 2012, 12:58:13 am »
    Many, many, many people think this way. Many have no concept of "private property", "no trespassing", etc. I catch a goodly number of people (usually suburb and city folk) who think they have all the right in the world to come onto my property during normal times. Horseriders are particularly bad about it, they'll cut fences and such without a second thought.

    Had one guy pull up in his pickup with a trailer loaded with ATVs and dirtbikes and proceed to unload them and him and his brats tore around on them on my property. Told him to get the hell off and he spouted off that he had a "right" to be there. On my motherfluffing property.

    The HELL you say!
    At least in Texas you have to give them several stern warnings, and a warning shot.
    After that it's open season.
    And everyone down there understands that rule!

    At least that's what my cousin stated.
    I'd just go as far as the showing of firearm...possible warning shot if I feel threatened...maybe.
    Just hope never to find out.


    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

    Kaso

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #15 on: July 16, 2012, 01:05:52 am »
    And honestly, this guy will probably leave once he figures out we don't keep beer in the house.
      :rotfl  :rotfl  :rotfl  :rotfl  :rotfl Yes, yes, I know that type.  Too well.

    Hopefully by fall I'll be outta here.
    I think I've mentioned them before, but when you go to buy guns, If you are limited by cost:
    -Used Remington 870, or Mossberg 500. Does everything.
    -S&W Model 10.  Cheap, and easy to shoot.
    -KelTec PF9.  Inexpensive gun and ammunition, and drops into a pocket easily.

    Those would be my first three guns, in that order.



    Kaso

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #16 on: July 16, 2012, 01:07:57 am »
    The HELL you say!
    At least in Texas you have to give them several stern warnings, and a warning shot.
    After that it's open season.
    And everyone down there understands that rule!

    At least that's what my cousin stated.
    I'd just go as far as the showing of firearm...possible warning shot if I feel threatened...maybe.
    Just hope never to find out.

    Uh...no.  Your cousin is way wrong, at least in terms of the letter of the law.  Now, 'understandings' of rural sheriffs may vary.

    But by law, as taught in CCW courses, you're not authorized to fire any shots unless you're justified in using deadly force.  Folks tearing around your land on ATVs doesn't qualify.

    Now, if it's dark, and you think they're trying to steal your stuff, it gets much murkier.
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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #17 on: July 16, 2012, 01:12:58 am »
    The HELL you say!
    At least in Texas you have to give them several stern warnings, and a warning shot.
    After that it's open season.
    And everyone down there understands that rule!

    At least that's what my cousin stated.
    I'd just go as far as the showing of firearm...possible warning shot if I feel threatened...maybe.
    Just hope never to find out.

    Langenator beat me to it.
    TexasOutbreak

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #18 on: July 16, 2012, 01:34:30 am »
    Uh...no.  Your cousin is way wrong, at least in terms of the letter of the law.  Now, 'understandings' of rural sheriffs may vary.

    But by law, as taught in CCW courses, you're not authorized to fire any shots unless you're justified in using deadly force.  Folks tearing around your land on ATVs doesn't qualify.

    Now, if it's dark, and you think they're trying to steal your stuff, it gets much murkier.

    That's the reason I mentioned 'threat' in there.
    Always take advice with a grain of salt and err on the side of caution.
    Murky as some of those situations can get.

    Point.
    If people are getting frustrated to a degree with response times from law enforcement, if they ever show up when you need them (No offense to the LEO's cause you guys are worked hard I know!); it doesn't make it any less frustrating that
    some yahoo and associates runs willy nilly all over your land and doesn't give two farts and a nickle about YOUR land?
    It's the arrogance of these people that get us upset.
    We OWN the land.
    We pay TAXES on OUR land.
    We MOW our land's grasses!
    We get 'tickets' for NOT mowing or weeding our land's grasses!

    And scolded like little kids we are told, by the powers that be, that WE don't have the authority.




    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

    Avenger29

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #19 on: July 16, 2012, 01:36:48 am »
    The HELL you say!

    Bo, I ain't kidding.

    Even down here in the South trespassers almost have more rights on your land than you do. You can't do (legally) much to them other than tell them to leave and call LE unless they are presenting a deadly threat (then you can choot 'em). Catch a bunch of thieves on your property? Same thing, can't do much about it other than call the law (in the meantime said trespassers or thieves have long since disappeared since it's going to take the law 45 minutes or better to get there unless they just happen to have a cruiser in the area, which is rare). yeah, it's frustrating as hell. I blame it on a society that has gotten soft on crime. Had a bunch of high schoolers come onto my (idiot) Uncle's property the other week (and we even have them on camera) stealing a bunch of stuff. Uncle wouldn't press charges and doesn't "get it" that these little thugs need a harsh lesson in the ways of the world. Without even a slap on the wrist that the theft charges would be they have learned that they can GET CAUGHT STEALING and get away with it scot free. Uncle justifies it by saying "but they were scared so they won't do it again". BS. You know how you fix a thief? It ain't by letting them go, i'll tell you that much! Just cause they are in high school doesn't mean they are too young to be taught the lesson between right and wrong.








    South Carolina
    I don't THINK I'll ever have to face down routers in the streets.

    I should hope not. Mobs of rogue woodworking tools would suck to repel.

    Gunnguy

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #20 on: July 16, 2012, 01:39:49 am »
    And they wonder why people find succession appealing.
     :facepalm
    Property owners used to have a say as to defending their property against thieves and murderers and such.
    Just need to get you a few cows and swear they were being rustled...LOL!

    Indiana'The average response time of a 911 call is over 23 minutes, the average response time of a .44 magnum is 1400 feet per second.'

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #21 on: July 16, 2012, 02:13:43 am »
    Wow.  She deserves to be without power for a month if a disaster strikes. 
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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #22 on: July 16, 2012, 07:56:42 am »
    Many, many, many people think this way. Many have no concept of "private property", "no trespassing", etc. I catch a goodly number of people (usually suburb and city folk) who think they have all the right in the world to come onto my property during normal times. Horseriders are particularly bad about it, they'll cut fences and such without a second thought.

    Had one guy pull up in his pickup with a trailer loaded with ATVs and dirtbikes and proceed to unload them and him and his brats tore around on them on my property. Told him to get the hell off and he spouted off that he had a "right" to be there. On my motherfluffing property.

    Find you some old drag behind spike harrows. Turn upside down in some key places on the property. No more 4 wheelers tearing up the property after they hit one.

    My father caught a nice 4 inch lifted 2001 4x4 Ford this way on our property. We told the kid a few times, and he kept cutting locks and fences to get into 4 wheel about and leave ruts everywhere. The front tires hit the harrow tossed it beneath his rig, and it proceeded to take out his tranny and some nice looking exhaust pieces. Kid called the law and they proceeded to fine and made him pay for destroying our farm equipment. We have no more 4 wheeling issues now.
    Oklahoma"If all our problems are solved, we'll find new ones to replace them. If we can't find new ones, we'll make new ones."

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #23 on: July 16, 2012, 08:47:53 am »
    Uh...no.  Your cousin is way wrong, at least in terms of the letter of the law.  Now, 'understandings' of rural sheriffs may vary.

    But by law, as taught in CCW courses, you're not authorized to fire any shots unless you're justified in using deadly force.  Folks tearing around your land on ATVs doesn't qualify.

    Now, if it's dark, and you think they're trying to steal your stuff, it gets much murkier.

    I wonder.  If it is legal to target shoot on your property, and you have a target set up and ready to go, and you decide that this is the time you want to do some target shooting, what would you get in trouble for?

    onesmack4u

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    Re: Oh God, Teh Stoopid! It BURNS!!!
    « Reply #24 on: July 16, 2012, 12:19:37 pm »
    Reckless Endangerment. If someone got hit with a stray round, then you would be liable since you knew they were in the area and shot anyway.
    « Last Edit: July 16, 2012, 01:36:44 pm by onesmack4u »
    AlabamaI have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

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