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Author Topic: Video Game Irks  (Read 12312 times)

Lupinus

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Re: Video Game Irks
« Reply #25 on: August 30, 2014, 06:19:43 am »
I'm not going to tell you why.

But next time pick a fight with one of the club wielding giants  :clap :clap :neener :rotfl :thumbup1
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    Atlas8193

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #26 on: August 30, 2014, 10:51:13 am »
    The "lunar forge" stuff is glitched. They never fixed it. It's basically a pansy fire damage enchantment.
    Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives, I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.-Winston Churchill

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #27 on: August 30, 2014, 12:57:48 pm »
    So I have found out... It did help me ice a troll though - so it was helpful.   Didn't really help against other creatures though.  Trolls don't like fire damage.
    It's hard to be a Man of Peace and just Walk The Earth in Skyrum.  I've been harassed, and hunted, and robbed, and insulted by city guards.  I walked into one town and the guard looked and me and said "You look how I feel".  Another one said, "What did someone steal your sweetroll?"
    Screw this being a nice guy.  I'm a man on the edge now!   I had a nice collection of daggers I had been carrying around.  I took them to a Merchant and sold them all and bought a nice long steel sword to match one I already had.  Then I went to a Forge and sharpened both till they had Fine gleaming sharp edges.   Nice.  I equipped them both.  Man!  I feel like such a BADASS with two swords!
    I need to try this out - But probably not a good idea to pick a fight in town.   So I go out the city gates and start wandering around looking for a bandit.  What I found was a Sabercat.  Think of a Mountain Lion the size of an actual lion.  And then take away any social skills or appreciation for life.   They are always pissed off at anything living.   This thing comes outta nowhere and attacks me!   I take a couple hits before I can get these swords outta the scabbards, and now I'm pissed.  I nail it with a couple quick power hits and the Sabercat is just not impressed and shows me how it's done... Slashes the crap out of me and ruins my new steel armor I found. 
    So I jump back and slam a couple Redbulls, and instantly feel better.  But this kitty isn't letting up, it comes at me again and I'm like "Hey, Get off me!  Bad Kittah!" and I hit it with my swords a couple more times, and then it hits me again, and I hit it back.  This goes on and on for awhile and I finally flatline the dang thing.  And now I'm out of my Redbulls, my Armor looks like hell, and I am feeling kinda silly.  So I walk back into town.  One of my Stormboy Homies sees me and says "You look ill."
    Yeah, I'm not feeling so good.  I walk back to the forge... "These swords just aint cuttin it.  What else do you got?"
    "You looking to do some Damage, eh?"
    He shows me a pair of axes and I think, yeah, dual axes would be nice...
    Ten minutes later, I'm back at the forge.  "Uh, yeah... I want to return these axes I just got."
    "What's wrong with them?"
    "Nothing really... it's just that I've never leveled up my Stamina and swinging these two heavy things is exhausting... I totally got killed by Sabercat just now.  I can't deal with them... they are too heavy."
    He just looks at me, keeping a straight face, "Twenty bucks each."
    "What do you mean you'll only give me 20 bucks for them?  I just got them!  They are brand new and I just paid 200 like ten minutes ago!"
    Dude just looks at me. "..."
    "Okay, fine, here. Here's the two axes, and I'll take that steel sword back.  It's full price?  Of course it is.   You know what, you suck.  You're customer service leaves a lot to be desired, let alone your shop looks like s___.  Just saying."
    "Do you want a shield?"
    "No."
    "Too heavy for you?  I have a leather one, my kids play with it..."
    "I'm leaving now."
    "Have nice day."
    So I'm back to just one Sword.  At least it's nice and sharp. But then I think, you know what?  Screw this too.  I put the sword back in it's sheath.   
    It's time to let the darkside out.  I speak the incantations and my fire spell is ready to go to work in my left hand and my right hand crackles with energy. 
    I grin evilly as I head back to the city gate.   Some old lady sees me and says "Is something wrong with you?  Are you feeling well?"
    "Oh fluff you, lady!"
    *sigh*
    Maybe she's right... I walk back up the hill to the inn and get room for the night.  I'm going to sleep for like 20 hours and then I'm going to eat every chicken in the place.
    The next day I'm feeling well rested, but depressed.  I go on a food binge and eat everything in the Inn.  Drink every bottle of ale, and wine I can find... I just don't care anymore. 
    "We don't have anything else.  Please... You hea Fou Owahs!  Eat Vegtible! You Go Now!"
    I stumble out the doors in a near food coma...
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    mattitude

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #28 on: August 30, 2014, 01:02:29 pm »
    I bought Skyrim (PS3) when it first came out and put SERIOUS hours into it but haven't picked up the game in close to 2 years.  As much as I loved the storyline I couldn't stand the loading wait times which was up to 2 minutes in some locations.  It got old real quick.  I did love so many of the locations and the scenery is just amazing.  The overall scope is mind boggling.  One thing to keep in mind is that when you start one of the wars it unlocks the dragons and if you get to that point when you are a lower level you will get decimated at every turn...but if you avoid that war and go everywhere else and level up you will stand a much greater chance against the dragons when you start the war.  I would also typically quick save before making a critical decision as if I made the wrong one (which I did countless times) it was easy to just "erase" said bad decision and go about my way.
    North CarolinaMedically retired Air Force (17 years, 7 months & 25 days)

    ksuguy

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #29 on: August 30, 2014, 02:07:49 pm »
    I have heard that the PS3 version was the bad one.   Lots of loading times,  s___ty performance, and full of bugs.   Playing it on the PC is the way to go if you do it. 
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    Lupinus

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #30 on: August 30, 2014, 07:02:05 pm »
    And then just wait till you get to the DLC's
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #31 on: August 30, 2014, 07:27:09 pm »
    Unfortunately I have way too many hours invested to go out and buy it on a different platform.  I don't have a high performance PC so the only other option would be on the Xbox360.

    I have heard that the PS3 version was the bad one.   Lots of loading times,  s___ty performance, and full of bugs.   Playing it on the PC is the way to go if you do it. 
    North CarolinaMedically retired Air Force (17 years, 7 months & 25 days)

    Plebian

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #32 on: August 30, 2014, 08:51:05 pm »
    Skyrim was just far to easy IMO.

    Stealth/one hand sword/bow/illusion spells and the whole game is just zero challenge. Get in a bad spot... Just calm the big fellow down and walk away... Too many baddies... Just throw a frenzy spell on them and watch them decimate their buddies.

    You can also get just retarded stealth and damage bonus armor from the Dark Brotherhood for basically just showing up.

    I then thought well... maybe it is stealth that is just overpowered. So I started over rolling heavy armor/shield/mace with healing spells. So a nice basic paladin build should up the difficulty a bit and be a different playstyle. It was an even worse face roll = win build. It even became easier once I finally realized I can get some hired goons to go with me. They tank the bad guys as my mediocre dps slowly offs them. If my tank gets low I just heal him to full.

    The only style that was challenging at all was a full on no armor wearing mage with no melee skills to speak of at all. Even that fellow got retard easy once I learned you can cast armor spells on yourself and summon some powerful tanky fellows. If you train up some stealth to go with it, and thieve those nice mage clothes from the Dark Brotherhood it gets to be just too easy as well.

    It was a pretty game, but it just lost all the fun for me very quickly.   
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #33 on: August 30, 2014, 09:20:54 pm »
     :facepalm
    It's been kicking my ass left and right....
     :banghead
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    Doug Wojtowicz

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #34 on: August 31, 2014, 01:44:06 am »
    The next day I'm feeling well rested, but depressed.  I go on a food binge and eat everything in the Inn.  Drink every bottle of ale, and wine I can find... I just don't care anymore. 
    "We don't have anything else.  Please... You hea Fou Owahs!  Eat Vegtible! You Go Now!"
    I stumble out the doors in a near food coma...

    John Pinette reference - for the win! :rotfl
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #35 on: August 31, 2014, 05:19:13 pm »
    My luck changed when I decided to buy a horse.  He's wonderfully sure-footed. I call him Billy.  As in a Billy Goat.  He climbs better than any mountain goat I've seen.  Which is helpful as I always find the worst routes to places, and Billy can go where I just can't. 
    He's wonderful in most respects, save one.
    He's a total coward.
    We were riding along a path and I found some standing stones that warranted closer inspection.  I climbed off Billy's back and before I could even step away, a little fox came out from behind some bushes and barked at Billy.  Billy shrieked, "WTF is THAT?" And promptly ran away!   "BILLY STOP, It's just a Fox!"  But Billy couldn't hear me as he had already galloped out of earshot. 
    Freaking horse... No sense chasing him now... he had done this before.  He'll run the panic out and settle down someplace where he thinks he's safe.  Might as well check out these stones. 
    So I turn back to the stones and look them over.  I've not seen these writings before since....  Dwarves.  Interesting.  Didn't know I was in Dwarf Country.  I look around and didn't find anything interesting, and I can't read Dwarvish.
    Now... where'd Billy get off too?
    *sigh*
    I've spent more time hunting for Billy than anything else lately.  I wonder if I can find a horse with a bit more courage.
    It was at that moment when the assassin leapt from the trees.   It was one of those Cat People... Kzinti or something... It was a female one.  She had two daggers, long ones, and they were coming at my heart.  I turned in time to block one, but the other one sunk deep into my shoulder.  There was no time to draw my sword so I just blasted her with fire from both hands at the same time.  I didn't even know I could do that!  She screamed as she tried to make a second strike on me, but the flames had fully engulfed her.  As she dropped to her knees and toppled forward onto her face, she only whimpered and then laid still, still burning.   I almost felt bad right there.  Until I moved my arm and my shoulder hurt like hell from the stab wound.   "You b____!"  Can you even call a female cat a b____?  I don't think so... but b____ just fit.  I kicked her.  Hard in the tit.  Huh... She had something in her pocket. 
    I reached down and pulled out a note, partially burned, but I could still read it.   It was a Contract from the Dark Brotherhood... to kill... HEY!  That's my name!   I looked back down at the charred kitty-lady.  "b____!"  I kicked her again.
    Now, who would put out a contract on me? 
    This bothered me and I stewed on it as I searched for my cowardly horse.  I found him gnoshing on some grass under a tree about a half mile away.  He heard me coming and perked his ears up.  "OH GOOD, YOU'RE STILL ALIVE!  I thought you were a goner!"
    "I sure do wish you would come back to me, like if a whistle or something."
    "Those sounds could be imitated."
    "Maybe so, but it would save me a lot of time wandering around looking for you."
    "But you always find me."
    "Maybe one day I wont bother looking so hard... and just keep going."
    "You'ld leave me out here?"  Billy looked panicked.  "But... but... but there are wolves and sabercats and bears and foxes!"  He whinnied in an unpleasant shudder.  "I hate foxes."
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    Mikee5star

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #36 on: August 31, 2014, 06:44:47 pm »
    George I am not sure how to say this, it is not meant as any thing but a compliment, this could go in the fiction section.  As read by someone who has never seen let alone played this game, I want to read more about the adventures of this character.
    Alaska

    Lupinus

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #37 on: August 31, 2014, 06:58:48 pm »
    Just wait till he starts running across the daedric princes to mess with.
    South Carolina

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #38 on: August 31, 2014, 08:14:32 pm »
    Tired of getting your but kicked? Play as an orc, go with a two handed weapon, heavy armor and learn to forge and enchant your own weapons. That way you can tailor all your gear for how you want it. (like making armor that increases bow skills.) Bow doesn't get really good until it slows down time when you aim.
    If the game's too easy, turn the difficulty up.
    There's a hidden chest in Dawstar that regenerates, btw. ;)
    I either play as a heavy Orc fighter or an argonian archer.
    the DLC's are good. I like the crossbow.
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #39 on: August 31, 2014, 08:57:05 pm »
    Many, many hours of downtime in the barracks killed playing Skyrim.  What the hell else is there to do when it's 115* fluffing degrees out.
    Yut

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #40 on: August 31, 2014, 09:01:16 pm »
    "Foxes are good luck," I said, patting Billy on the neck. And then I noticed that just above the stream we were by, was a strange domed structure on either side of the stream, with a bridge between them.  It was beautifully built, and obviously ancient.  My curiosity got the best of me and I decided to check it out.   The steps up to the bridge were wide enough to ride so I coaxed Billy up and over the bridge.  On the side was this alter thing. 
    I slide off Billy's back and walked up to it.  Dwarvish symbols were around the edge of this carved stone alter... and on top of it lay a golden helmet and sword.  They gleamed in the late afternoon sunlight.  The helmet was a bit heavier than my steel Imperial lid.  Looking around and seeing no one, I snagged that thing.  It was pretty cool, and actually fit me mellon pretty well. The sword though... WHOA!   As soon as I picked it up, the engravings on the blade glowed from within like the blade was red-hot from the inside out.  I put it back down and the glow faded instantly.  I picked it up again and the enchantment activated.
    "Oh HELL YEAH!" 
    Billy just looked at me.
    "A magic sword!  I got a freaking magic sword!"
    Billy just rolled his eyes, "sounds great."
    "I got a freaking magic, enchanted, blade of awesome!"  I shouted.  Birds in the trees instantly took flight at my sudden and loud shouting.
    I wonder what it does.   Huh... I can't read anything on the blade, but there is obviously something written there.  Dwarvish again.  Dwarvish bridge, alter, helmet, sword... Dwarves are freaking awesome!  I love Dwarves!
    I hop back up onto Billy's back and we trot along a trail we discovered.  Soon we came to some steps carved into the hillside.  Oh hey, it's dwarvish stuff!   Fantastic!  I wonder if I can find some more armor.  I wonder if it would even fit me! 
    We trot up to the steps and I could sense Billy's growing apprehension, so I slide off and dig out an apple from my pack. "Here, you stay here, be a good horse.  Promise me you'll stay here?"  I held out an Apple.   
    Billy looked at the apple and back down the trail we came... I could tell he was thinking this over.  "If you promise me you'll stay, I'll give you this apple, and another one when I come back.  So that's two Apples for just staying."
    Horses have no concept of numbers, but he did understand 'more than one' so his ears flicked with excitement and he nodded.  "Okay."
    So I gave him the nice fat red apple and he was content to stay put.
    I looked up the steps eager to find some cool dwarvish loot.   "Be careful!  I want my other apple!"  Billy said.  I grinned at him and pulled out my new magic sword.  He rolled his eyes again, so hard he rolled his head too.
    I bound up the stairs two at a time, "Come on Treasure!"
    Well, two bandits were up at the top of the stairs heard me and stood up.  "What do we have here?  Some fresh meat?" One of them said as he notched an arrow into his bowstring.
    "I think we'll take whatever he's got."  Said the other as he drew his sword. "No need to be picky!"
    I side stepped near a pillar as the two separated, and I kept the pillar between me and the archer.   "You just bit off more than you can chew."  I said.
    "Oh really?"  The bandit with the blade said. 
    Fire crackled from my left hand, with wisps of smoke curling from my fingers.  I've gotten better with my fire magics.  Then I raised the golden dwarvish sword.  "Come get some."  I taunted. 
    The bandit came to get some.  As he lunged, his swing missed as I had stepped back just out of range and then stepped inside with a swing of my own.  I connected right under his sword arm with a solid hit, but one that wouldn't be lethal... normally.  But all the sudden the bandit was engulfed in flames.   He fell screaming and writhing as he burned to death, and I just looked at my sword.
    "So that's what you do!"  I laughed.   "Oh man I love Dwarves!"
    I forgot about the archer as he bounced an arrow shaft off my helmet.  Without even looking at him, I raised my left hand and sprayed fire all over him in a constant stream.  I didn't take my eyes off this wonderful sword. The power it had!   Amazing!
    I stepped over the BBQ'd archer and walked up a few more steps and into a doorway.  This led through to a hall that opened up into an amazing courtyard.  There were steps that led down to a golden colored gate.   
    "Sweet!  Dwarven treasures await!"  Without fear, I skipped down the steps and at the bottom was this lever sticking out.  Huh.  I wonder what this does.  Being curious and expecting treasures, I pulled the lever. 
    At first, nothing happened.
    And then I heard a strange sound.  Voop Voop Voop Voop VOOP  VOOP!  It was getting louder and coming from behind.  I turned just in time see a whirling blade coming right for my neck!  I jumped aside, just barely in time.  It was a wheel with blades on it the length of spears. Heavy blades.  When the wheel reached the bottom it folded up and I could see the mechanism pull back up the original position.  Huh?
    I pulled the lever again and the wheel popped back out, blades unfolded and the contraption spun as it moved down the stairs. 
    "A whirling head chopper machine?"  I said out loud.  "Who would make such a thing?"
    Dwarves, obviously.  I answered myself.  But I didn't know why.  I turned to the door and opened it.
    10 minutes later I came running back out through the door... "I hate dwarves!  I fluffing hate dwarves! fluff all dwarves!  I'm glad you a______s are extinct! You all suck!"
    My helmet was dented all over, my new sword was chipped and dull, my armor was shredded, and all my magic power was used up on healing.
    I stumbled back to Billy, who was, as promised, right there under the tree where I left him.  "Wow," he said.  "You look like hell.  You musta got your ass beat."
    "I really hate dwarves."
    Billy just looked at me.  "Uh huh... Cool story bro.  You got my apple?"
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #41 on: August 31, 2014, 09:52:55 pm »
    Don't make me write Skyrim fiction. I'll do it.
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #42 on: August 31, 2014, 11:10:22 pm »
    Don't make me write Skyrim fiction. I'll do it.

    From George's posts it sounds like it is a fertile field.
    Alaska

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #43 on: September 01, 2014, 04:32:26 am »
    I'm a sneaky bas___d when I discovered you could sneak behind people and cut throats...almost as fun as the power strike that lops off heads


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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #44 on: September 01, 2014, 10:08:29 am »
    The most fun if you are the sneaky type is the khajiit. You use no weapons and train up heavy armor until you get to the perk of adding your armor rating of your gloves to unarmed attacks. You can then do sneak attacks from behind, and a do a sweet one shot fatal German suplex attack.

    It is helpful to just wear the heavy armor gloves later, and be sure and train up your illusion magic to keep the fights 1v1. You cast armor on yourself before the brawl begins so you are still quick on your feet. If you wear full heavy armor it slows your acceleration rate down too much to be an effective kung fu master. :D
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #45 on: September 01, 2014, 10:11:42 am »
    Also, aside from enchanting, doing the various missions will often lead to good loot.
    My sneaky argonian had I think four items, helmet, gloves, necklace, ring, that all gave bonuses to archery. I'd remain undetected and kill people without them even knowing I was there. The fight was often over before it started. (I love the slo-mo shot of the arrow in flight.)
    My Orc heavy, when I was in a tough fight, I'd use my berserk power and I'd do double damage with my giant hammer and only take half damage. It was like putting the game on easy.
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #46 on: September 01, 2014, 08:02:10 pm »
    One irk?  Reinstalling a game on an updated computer system.  I've been redownloading Saints Row 2 and DC Universe Online since Friday night.  :banghead
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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #47 on: September 01, 2014, 08:09:18 pm »
    "A whirling head chopper machine?"  I said out loud.  "Who would make such a thing?"

    1 - Nice Galaxy Quest riff.

    2 - You mean that hasn't been done in Uprising yet?
    IllinoisAfter a shooting spree, they want to take the guns away from everyone who didn't do it.

    -William Burroughs

    SJW is not a synonym of "leftists" or "liberals". Left-wing and right-wing positions are based on economics. SJWs are left-authoritarians which means that they are not liberals. Don't paint all leftists or liberals with the same (misguided) brush.

    GeorgeHill

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #48 on: September 01, 2014, 08:21:21 pm »
     :coffee  Yup.  I'm a sick bastard.
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    Doug Wojtowicz

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    Re: Video Game Irks
    « Reply #49 on: September 02, 2014, 12:00:16 am »
    :coffee  Yup.  I'm a sick bastard.


    That's a prerequisite for all men I respect.  :whistle
    IllinoisAfter a shooting spree, they want to take the guns away from everyone who didn't do it.

    -William Burroughs

    SJW is not a synonym of "leftists" or "liberals". Left-wing and right-wing positions are based on economics. SJWs are left-authoritarians which means that they are not liberals. Don't paint all leftists or liberals with the same (misguided) brush.

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